Karl's Top 7 - Favorite Movies when I was 9

Back in 1999, things were a little simpler. We were still worried about Y2K, Sega was still making systems, and boy bands were delivering subliminal messaging urging us to join the army. Good times. This was also, in my eyes, one of the golden periods for films, and my top 7, according to how I ranked them at the time, are below.

7. Pokemon: The Movie
Not only was Pokemon just about the coolest fucking thing in the world, but Mewtwo, the main antagonist of the film, is just a straight up badass. I remember this moving be sold out at the local theater for the longest time, but eventually I managed to go see it. My dad even sent away to get the free cards because they had run out at the theater by the time I saw the movie. My memory of the plot is a little fuzzy (something about Mewtwo cloning an army of Pokemon, and Ash turned to stone, but love brought him back to life), but I remember it was way better than the Digimon movie. Also, trying to watch Digimon again is painful. The writing is so bad I'm not quite sure it legally qualifies as writing. And there's like 8 digivolutions an episode. Pokemon > Digimon > Monster Rancher any day.
Best Quote - Mewtwo: So this is my power... what is my purpose?

6. Aladdin
Of course, there have to be some Disney classics on the list. Aladdin is still the shit, and the Genie still has his charm. Abu is a straight pimp though. With that hat and that vest he must be picking up all the lady monkeys he wants. Also, I know all the words to A Whole New World. Like a boss.
Best Quote - Merchant: Look at this! Yes! Heh, heh. Combination hookah and coffee maker, also makes Julienne fries. Will not break!

5. Lion King
The first movie I can remember seeing in theaters, Lion King was just about as awesome a movie as you could see as a child. You learned a lesson, laughed at Timon and Pumba, and even got to hear the sweet sound of Whoopi Goldberg's voice. Going back and watching again, I'm pretty sure there's a lion sex scene. Like, they don't show it, but you know what's going on. Also, I didn't realize till I saw the IMDB page that Mr. Bean was Zazu and Cheech Marin was one of the hyenas.
Best Quote - Pumbaa: It's our motto.
                    Young Simba: What's a motto?
                    Timon: Nothing. What's a motto with you?

4. Men In Black
If there's one thing that everyone can agree on, it's that aliens are awesome. So when a movie about aliens featuring the Fresh Prince comes out, you know its gonna be a classic. I remember having this movie on VHS (actually, the only movies I didn't have on VHS on this list are #7 and #1) and watching it over and over again. I hear they're making another sequel, and I'll definitely check it out.
Best Quote - Zed: We're not hosting an intergalactic kegger down here.

3. Small Soldiers
These action figures were BADASS. They took the action to your fucking face, and then blew it through the back of your brain. These toys were here to fuck up your day and piss on your grave. Gorgonites were totally lame in comparison. Also, I remember the main kid was always getting kicked out of school, but didn't look nearly hard enough for that to be the case.
Best Quote - Chip Hazard: Soldiers, no poor sap ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by         being all that he can be. Damn the torpedoes, or give me death! Eternal vigilance is the price of duty. And, to the victors go the spoils. So remember: you are the best of the best of the few and the proud. So ask not what your country can do for you, only regret that you have but one life to live! The war against the Gorgonites will be won! Commando Elite, let the first shot be fired! Search out the Gorgonites and frag 'em all!

2. Space Jam
One word sums up this movie: classic. The plot, for those of you that have decided not to watch one of the greatest works in cinema history, tells a story of how Michael Jordon helps the Looney Tunes defeat aliens (who we have already declared as awesome) that have gotten skills by sucking the souls out of other top NBA stars. Add in a fantastic Bill Murray cameo, and the most 90's soundtrack possible and you get, what is for many, the film of a generation.
Best Quote - Charles Barkley: It was this girl, five-feet-nuthin'. Blocked my shot!
                     Psychiatrist: When did you first start having this dream?
                    Charles Barkley: It wasn't a dream, it really happened!

1. Good Burger
This is my favorite movie of all time. I don't mean that as a joke, I genuinely enjoy the fuck out of this movie. I may have been the only person in the world to preorder the DVD when it was released. I can recite pretty much any line out of the movie whether it be Kel explaining how to sneak inside Mondo Burger or Otis complaining about his broken ass. BTW what ever happened to Kel? Is he still alive?
Best Quote - Kurt: You mess with Kurt, and you go in the grinder.
                    Dexter: Okay, now this "grinder" of yours. Is it a real grinder or is it just some kind of metaphor?