Karl's Picks - UFC on Versus 3

Another week, another card. I'm always down for a free card, and the fact that we actually get to see some cool fights only sweetens the deal. BTW for us Canadians, the card should be on Sportsnet, but I am in no way sure of this, nor will I go check. Anyways, onto the picks.

Todd "Bulldog" Brown (15-2) vs Igor "The Duke" Pokrajic (22-8)
Brown is 0-1 in the UFC, losing a decision to Tim Boetsch last August, though he was not dominated. "The Duke" is 1-3 in the UFC, most recently dropping a decision to Stephan Bonnar last December. He had lost his first two fights to Vlad Matyushenko (by decision) and James Te Huna (by TKO) before submitting James Irvin with a rear-naked choke. Both these guys have to prove that they belong in the Octagon - a loss likely means a departure from the UFC. Pokrajic did nothing to impress me against Bonnar, but I know nothing about Brown, so I see the fight as a coin flip. I'll go with Brown, but I really don't know (or care).

Karl's Top 7 - Moments from Pokemon Red and Blue

A screen I've seen countless times

If you're here from Them Happenings, welcome to Karl's Shenanigans. We do things a little differently over here, but that's OK. Enjoy the following presentation

Pokemon Red was the very first video game I ever got. My sisters had an NES and a Game Gear, so I had experience playing Mario and Sonic, but Pokemon Red, along with my lime Gameboy Color and Pokemon Pinball, were the first games (and system) that I got. And I loved the shit out of Pokemon Red. I got it for Christmas back in '98, and I must have played it for at least seven hours the day I got it (considering I was 8, that's pretty impressive). I had friends that had Pokemon before me, so I knew the basics, but it was a different experience playing through my own adventure. This top 7 is for the most memorable moments in that first adventure, listed in order of occurrence. I will also note the differences between the original playthrough and a recent FireRed playthrough I did.

Knowledge is Power!

Did you know Martin Lawrence, famed thespian, was born in Germany? That's almost as surprising as the fact that somehow Big Momma's House got two sequels.

Don't care about Martin Lawrence? First off, shame on you. The man was in motherfucking Black Knight. Two, here's a remix of Childish Gambino's Put it in my Video and Wiz Khalifa's Black and Yellow.

Armchair Matchmaker - UFC 127

Another event down, more fights to line up. Overall, it was a pretty solid card. Some pretty big upsets (Siver, Ebersole, Hunt) made things interesting, though no one likes to see a draw, especially in a main event. Anyways, onto the matchups

Cut List - Jason Reinhardt, Tom Blackledge, Chris Tuchscherer

Fights to make

Jon Fitch vs the winner of Diego Sanchez v Martin Kampmann
No, I don't want to see an immeadiate rematch with BJ Penn. Fitch struggled with BJ for two rounds before beating the shit out of him in the third. I had the fight scored as a draw (BJ takes the first two rounds, Fitch takes the last round 10-8), and I don't really think the fight drops either fighters stocks at all. In a fight against either Sanchez (who he holds a close win over) or Kampmann, Fitch gets a chance to cement his status at the top of the weight list and try again to get a shot at the title. With St Pierre potentially giving up the belt in order to move to middleweight, Fitch could fins himself the top contender with one more win.

Putting the "Street" in Sesame Street

Ernie looks like he's killed a man before

LaVar Motherfucking Burton

Credit goes to Troy Barnes

Flying Turtles, NBD

Yep.

Music Nerds being Music Nerds

Now, I never took Music class in high school. Two reasons: I suck at music, and music kids got WAY too into thier shit. Below is video proof of such beingwaytoointothisshitness.

Note how fucking into the song that flute player in the red shirt is (flutist? I don't know, nor give a shit). She really needs to tone shit down. Your in a fucking school band, no need to start acting like your at a fucking Megadeth concert. Also, looks like Zack de la Rocha really let himself go.

The Universe is fucking huge

I thought I posted this before, but I guess it got lost somewhere along the way. Anyways, the universe is really big. Like really fucking big. So big that it's really hard to fathom just how immense it is. I think this video can help put it into perspective, even though it doesn't include the actual biggest known star. If you want to get your mind blown, check this out. Note: Bowls are highly advised before viewing.

Them Happenings

My buddy Chen also has a blog, Them Happenings. It's not at all the same stuff you'd find here, but it's still good shit. He also helped me make my blog a little bit prettier, so I have to thank him for that. If you want to read about Anime and stuff like that, I highly reccomend it. On his advice, I've included a picture that kinda combines his blog with mine.

Oak is even more excited for you beating the Elite Four then you are.

The Problem with Pants

Ah dry humping, the home run of Grade 7. Don't they know the dangers of denim burn? They forgot the part where you shouldn't be in public.... or wearing pants. Granted, almost every situation can be made better by the removal of pants. Don't believe me? Try it out!



Also, the sassy black girl summing it up at the end? Classic.

So there might be another planet in our solar system

 (Absent: A fucking massive planet)

And i'm not talking about pluto. This article talks about a possible planet at they very edge of our solar system that sends asteroids and that kind of shit at the rest of the planets. Oh, and the planet could be up to four times the size of Jupiter. Because it's so far away and so cold, it's really hard to see, but some nerds said its possible, and nerds are usually right about this kind of shit.

Edit: We also found a star that was about double the maximum size we thought stars could be - It's only 300 times the size of our sun, no biggie.

Science Class

Hope this clears it up ICP.

Woo One Month Anniversary

It's official:: Karl's Shenanigans has been up and running for a full month now. I have to admit, this has ended up consuming a lot more time than I thought it would. Looking forward, I'm thinking of ways to improve the site. One day I really want to spend a bunch of time formatting the site to make it prettier and what not, but formatting is lame and I don't like things that are lame (and neither should you). I figured I would give a breakdown on some of the stats that the site has compiled so far.

Total page views: 504

Most popular article (based on page views): Drinking Achievement List

Most common browser used to visit the site: Firefox, at 86%

Most common operating system used to visit the site: Windows, at 89%

I'm hoping that we can get some better numbers moving forward, though I'm not exactly sure how I'm going to do that. If you guys got any ideas, comment below. And now, for the site loyalists, the movie poster for The Kodiak Bear. Enjoy.

Karl's Picks - UFC 127

It's time for another installment of Karl's Picks, and this time were looking at the UFC 127 card taking place in the land Down Under. BJ Penn continues his run at welterweight and could get another title shot if he can get past perennial #2 welterweight Jon "The Blanket" Fitch. Rumor is that Paul Hogan, a bunch of wallabies, and the ghost of Steve Irwin will be sitting cage side. Don't worry Steve, the sting rays can't hurt you there (unless..... WE ALL NEED TO START WORRYING ABOUT STING RAYS THAT CAN CROSS LAND! GATHER ARMS AND WE'LL SHOW THESE MOTHERFUCKING RAYS TO STAY IN THE GODDAMN OCEAN!). Yeah, I went with a cheap Steve Irwin joke. Deal with it.

Jason "The Littlest Hobo" Reinhardt (20-1) vs Tie Quan Zhang (12-1)
Zhang makes his UFC debut and Reinhardt returns in our first fight of the night. Reinhardt has one of the most impressive records in MMA, but there's a dirty secret behind it: all of his opponents BLOW. He's one of the most notorious can smashers in the sport. His 20 wins come against competition that is a combined 56-87, with only three of them having winning records (take out those three, and his competition drops to 18-68). His loss comes in his only other appearance in the octagon, when Joe Lauzon easily defeated him in just over a minute. Along with this, he's tiny. If other fighters are like regular size chocolate bars, he'd be one of those little ones you hand out at Halloween. While Zhang comes in off a loss, he's still one of the better featherweight prospects out there. Zhang split his two WEC appearances, submitting Pablo Garza with a guillotine in the first and then losing to Danny Downes via decision. His wrestling needs work, as shown in the loss to Downes, but he should be able to overpower Reinhardt, either winning by TKO or submission in the first. Reinhardt can then move down to his natural weight class of 95 pounds.

Reinhardt isn't getting too much love from me, if you couldn't tell already.

Cappin' bitches in the name of the Lord

And not a single fuck was given that day

Gangsta Watson

In tribute to, as Ken Jennings put it, our new computer overlords, I bring you this: A mash-up of the Jeopardy IBM challenge and Menace 2 Society. Two great tastes that taste great together.

Bitches on the Friers

Best restaurant review ever.

The Perfect Crime

I'm not telling you to commit crimes, but if you do, don't leave any witnesses.

Karl's Top 7 - Fighters in Japan that should come to the UFC

It's no secret that MMA in Japan is falling apart. Both Dream and WVR are bleeding money, and we've already seen two fighters (Jorge Santiago and Dave "Pee Wee" Herman) jump ship to come to the UFC. With more fighters likely to follow suit, I figured I would list the top seven fighters I most want to see come to the Octagon. NOTE - if you're not a big MMA fan, you probably won't know many of the names on this list, and probably won't find this interesting. May I suggest looking at some of the other recent posts?

Honorable Mentions: There's a bunch of guys that could be good additions - Maximo Blanco, Mitsuhiro Ishida, Joachim Hansen - but I'm not sure how they would do in the Octagon. Shinya Aoki has already proven that he's a horrible striker, so I just feel he would get exploited in the UFC.

Charlie Murphy's True MMA Stories

No explanation necessarily - just watch

Very Super Famous

I've long been a fan of Jon Lajoie. Starting with High as Fuck, and moving on to gems like Everyday Normal Guy and Show Me Your Genitals, he's been creating Youtube hits for a few years now. His newest video, Very Super Famous, may be one of his best yet. His overtly sexual lines range from clever "I'm Che Vagina, I liberate girls from oppressive pants" to silly "I always make sure to wear a condom cause my sperm is so famous it can make you pregnant in your bum". I'll stop talking and just post the video already

LEMME SMANG IT

I was over at iamdonald.com listening to a sick new Gambino tune (Freaks and Geeks, which you can check out after the jump) when I came across the song "Lemme Smang It". The music video for the song is something to behold. I like the actual song, but the music video is simply amazing. I have no idea how serious the song is (I refuse to believe that someone made the video without realizing how hilarious it is) and the one guy clearly stole my dance moves, but I still think everyone should see it (even you Jorge, I know you're reading this shit).

I know present to you "Lemme Smang It"

This should sum up Valentine's Day

 After the jump, a few more pictures that have nothing to do with Valentine's Day, but are still awesome

This was my favorite song in Grade 8

I remember in grade 8 everytime we had computer class everyone would just watch music videos on this one site, and my favorite video to watch (along with Hell Song by Sum 41) was "Holidae In", a song that boasted the talents of three of the greatest performers of all time: Snoop Dogg, Ludacris, and of course my main man Chingy. I remember I used to be able to recite Ludacris' verse word for word on command (no beat neccesary). I liked the song so much that I asked for the Chingy CD for my birthday (I got the CD too, along with the D12 CD with "My Band" on it). The song stands the test of time - lyrics like "My name Ching-a-ling, equipped with much ding-a-ling" will never go out of style. Fun fact - when Chingy said he was gonna pick up an ounce of dro on route to the party, in Grade 8 I had no idea what "dro" was, but an ounce didnt sound like much. Oh how I have learned since then.



BTW, I realize that the video is censored, but I feel it only stand to make it better (they censor the stupidest things, like BET)

Like a Boss

Yep.

Strikeforce Afterthoughts

Strikeforce kicked off it's heavyweight grand prix yesterday, and the result was five entertaining fights with five finishes. The big news coming out of the event is Antonio Silva's upset TKO win over Fedor. After a competive first round, Silva started to dominate Fedor, getting to mount and raining down punches, while throwing in a few submission attempts. By the end of the round, Fedor's face was FUCKED UP, and the ref called an end to the fight. A year ago, if you said that fedor had lost two straight fights, especially with one of those fights being Antonio Silva, pretty much anyone would have asked you what drugs you were on and if they could in on that shit. Yet, here we are. Silva will now face the winner of Alistair Overeem and Fabricio Werdum if everything goes to plan, which given what happened and Strikeforce's history isn't likely to happen.

It's the weekend, time for some links

Links woo

Ever wanted to see what would happen if two random pokemon fucked? Yes you do

Troll Science 101

Your daily dose of random pictures

Classic Cracked - Notes on the First Draft of Casino Royale

Looking for a good Blue Jays blog? I got ya covered

Maddox - 13 year old me's favorite internet writer

Links are good for you

Fuck this shit, I'm going to space

The universe is big. Really fucking big. I for one think that space is pretty cool, just because theres so much crazy shit out there (like Saturn's moon Titan, which has similar atmosphere to Earth, along with rivers and lakes and oceans. The difference is the rivers are filled with natural gas instead of water, and the temperature is well below -100 degrees celsius). I decided to show you guys a video I found a while back that I found during a late night stumble session. Enjoy. CAUTION - Bowls are highly reccomended before watching this video.

Keep in mind, that video only shows stars that we know about, and there are literally trillions of stars we don't know about. Try wrapping your mind around that. It's cool, I'll give you a minute.

Karl's Picks - Strikeforce Fedor vs Silva

I decided to do the picks for the upcoming strikeforce card, as I feel it's big enough to warrant it. The main card is all fights in the Heavyweight Grand Prix that they're starting to see who the top contender will be. Knowing Strikeforce, and the fighters involved, I can't see this ending well, but at least we will get to see some of the fights. I am only picking for the fights on the maincard, cause the strikeforce undercard is where dreams go to die.

Chad Griggs (9-1) vs Gian Villante (7-1)
The first of three grand prix reserve bouts, Griggs and Villante are probaly the least well known fighters in the tournament. Griggs, who upset Bobby Lashley in his only Strikeforce experience thus far, has never been to decision and holds eight of his nine wins by KO or TKO. Villante has fought his entire career in the Ring of Combat promotion and has also never been to decision, with his lone loss coming from injury. Neither of these guys have faced tough competition - this fight could be the toughest test so far for both fighters, but given the finishes between the two I doubt this will go to decision. Griggs has the biggest win with Lashley, so I'll pick him to win by TKO in the second.

Karl's Top 7 - Sites that You Should Be Checking Out

I've covered video games, music and television so far in my top ten lists, it's time to move on to the interwebs. I spend a good part of every day traveling around the internet, looking at cool shit, learning about cool shit, and now that I have my own blog, writing about cool shit. I've put together a link of seven websites that you should be checking out, cause they're awesome

7) 11 Points
11 Points, which as it's name would imply, is simply 11 Point lists. Lists tend to make for interesting posts - they are easy to read, and pretty fun to write. Making all your lists have eleven entries is daring - making seven points is hard enough sometimes - and the guy who writes there manages to keep it interesting (at least most of the time, some of his posts aren't my cup of tea, but most of the time he nails it). He updates about three times a week, so you don't need to check every day, but once a week will net you a few posts every visit.

Fat White Kids Dancing - God's Greatest Gift to Mankind

This young man, with dancing clearly embedded in his very essence, challenges another child to a dance off. Though clearly up against a better dancer, he musters all the energy he can get in to what can only be considered one of the greatest performances of all time. This fat white child leaves everything out there - his heart, his soul - in his face off against who I am forced to believe is his arch rival in dancing. WARNING - You may be overexposed to pure awesome by watching this video. Thanks go to Gorillamask (a site you really should be checking out) for the much needed Cannibal Corpse mashup.



PS - Someone needs to bring some of these moves, most notably the frogwalk, to the bars. Guarantee you're getting laid if you use these moves.

Armchair Matchmaker - UFC 126

UFC 126 just went down, and it was a pretty massive card. Silva knocked out Belfort with a fucking front kick, that he claimed he learned from Steven Seagal. It's official - Anderson Silva is both one of the best fighters in the world and also batshit insane. His mask thing in the weigh ins was just weird. Who does shit like that? Also, I meant to get this done earlier, but the Internet at my school sucks absolute balls and it's taken me a while to see the fights (I didn't even see all of them, but from what I heard about Torres v Banuelos I didn't miss much. Now, on to the fights

Cut List - Gabe "Cake Boss" Reudiger. Everyone else I feel deserves another fight.

Fights to make

Anderson Silva vs Georges St. Pierre (if St. Pierre defeats Jake Shields at UFC 129)
The timing is perfect for this superfight between the two. It would be the biggest fight in UFC history and is the fight that everyone wants to see. St. Pierre has looked unstoppable, completly cleaning out the division. The same can be said for Silva, though he has a bunch of frustrating performances to go with his explosive finishes. This fight has to happen soon, or it likely will never happen at all. If St. Pierre somehow loses to Jake Shields in Toronto then the next challenger for Silva should be Yushin Okami, the last fighter to get a win over Silva (even if it was by DQ).

Green and Yellow

I've been hearing alot about Lil Wayne's new song Green and Yellow. I listened to it, it's pretty good, I just didn't see Weezy making a song about his love of the Green Bay Packers. Figured he'd be a Saints fan. The line about Polumalu's hair was pretty good. As for my pick in the Superbowl, I really don't care. I'm not a big football fan, but if I had to pick one, I'd be going with the Steelers and Big Ben Rapelisberger.

EDIT: The video doesn't seem to work anymore, but you can still listen to the song here

Karl's Top 7 - Favorite N64 Games

The N64 was a big part of my childhood. My sister had an NES, and I had a gameboy, but I still feel like my N64 was my first video game console. I remember being in the store when my mom bought it (The store was the EB in Markville Mall). It was my birthday, and I had been asking for one non stop, and I might have had a good report card too, but I was still shocked when I ended up getting one. My N64 came with Pokemon Stadium and the thing so that you could import your pokemon in, and I couldn't have picked a better first game. I didn't own all of the games on this list (in fact, I didn't start enjoying one of them until recently) but I either rented them or my friend's had it.

Honorable Mentions
Pokemon Snap - Loved the game, and I remember it was expensive for a long time, so I rented it like 5 times. It could also be beaten easily within two hours, so that kinda takes away from it. Playing it in my buddy's basement last summer was a highlight though.

Links to Tide You Over till the Weekend

Figured I'd give you guys some links because I found out how to do hyperlinks (I know, I know, I'm the shit)

I geuss I have to give my Piss Bandit title up

The Very Best of Scumbag Steve

The hipsters are taking our beloved TV!

The greatest link the world has ever seen

AWESOME ALERT: Puppies playing tetherball

Woo hyperlinks!

Karl's Picks - UFC 126

I made 'em for the Fight Night card, now I'll make the picks for UFC 126, headlined by the Anderson Silva Vitor Belfort middleweight title fight. It should be a good card, lots of really interesting fights, so lets get down to the picks.

Mike Pierce (11-3) vs Kenny Robertson (10-0)
A welterweight fight where the winner takes a big step up the food chain. Pierce is 3-1 in the UFC, and riding a two fight win streak over Julio Paulino and Amilcar Alves following a decision loss to Jon Fitch. Robertson is making his UFC debut, and most recently submitted TUF vet John Kolosci in Bellator. Robertson has a pretty solid resume, holding wins over guys like LeVon Maynard and Herbet Goodman, but Pierce is a tough test for anyone. Pierce really hasn't shown me anything special yet though, so I'm picking Robertson to make his name by submitting Pierce in the second.